Monday, December 23

Who will you be when you realize you weren't who you thought you were?

Who will you be when you realize you weren't who you thought you were? 

No longer are you child, mother, father, sibling…whatever used to define you. 

One day I woke up and discovered that I had been fired from being a mother, my children had grown up!  Certainly to some degree, I'll always be that, but I really shifted from the mother role to a peer role with my children. 

It took a lot of counseling and conscious work to make this shift and though I still struggle with it at times, I've come to use the following two questions in wanting to support but not live their lives. When they come to me with a question or need, I simply use these questions that I learned from crashing my dad's van in a snow storm. "Are you okay? and What can I do to help you?" 

This gives the other, (no matter the age) not only support and encouragement to live their life, but it also allows them the dignity of making their own choices. 

The question for us then becomes: Who and what am I going to do with all the free time I'm going to have? Think back and try to remember What makes you smile and what brings you joy? 
Hint: It can't be someone or something else. Happy Hunting! 

Thursday, December 19

ACTION IS REQUIRED TO MOVE THROUGH FEAR

Especially during this holiday season, fear of meeting others and going to parties with people who are unfamiliar, can bring a bit of anxiety with it. 

John Lennon said it well in the quote below, but to summarize, 
We should love ourselves and accept who we are, who we were created to me with love and compassion, we can begin to stop comparing ourselves with others. 

Once we accept that we are not better or worse, prettier or not prettier, skinnier or fatter than anyone else; that we are all created as unique individuals and we are all at different places on the path of life. Perhaps then we will free ourselves from paralyzing fear and take action; Saying YES to life and going to places that we've been invited with the curiosity and fun nature of a child.

For me recently, as my new job I was invited to a Bond-Fire for the team I work with. I accepted, I went, but didn't go inside. When asked what happened to me, I told the story and said, "Next time I plan to go in!" And I did and it was good. 

Perhaps this Holiday Season, you too may decide to move through fear and begin embracing and celebrating life, no matter how it looks for you. 

The choice is ours and ours alone.

Live, Live, Live, Life is a banquet and 
most poor souls are starving!!! 
Auntie Mamme

Sunday, December 15

ASK THE QUESTION

Transition back into a normal lifestyle…whatever normal is…has been a bit challenging for me after living my alternative lifestyle for over five years. 

One of the main challenges is making ends meet, just like millions of americans. After I had been in my new apartment for a couple of months, I realized that what I brought in didn't cover what was going out. So one day, I took a day and reviewed the situation and decided to Ask The Question.

The electric company had wanted a $225 deposit and the gas company wanted $70. After discussing the situation with a neighbor, I called and asked the question; Could I get the deposits waived? Simply by asking the question, they both were removed.

Next on the list, cable/internet. I had signed up for it when I was in deep depression, but basic cable is like not having television at all and it was $70. So, I took the box back and spent the next hour on the phone but the bill was waived. 

Lastly in this series, the bank had charged a $34 overdraft fee and I used the same technique. I simply asked the question. 

I make $12 an hour and I would have had to work 28 hours before taxes to pay these charges. Simply by Asking the Question, I was able to make a positive difference in my budget. 

Don't shy away, be bold and ASK THE QUESTION! 

Friday, October 25

Being in Choice, choosing health

Trying to get back on track to living my life again, after several weeks of major panty twists and tears, I wrote to my VBFF and was giving him an update on my progress. I told him I was writing one hour each day and working on my health.

You see, he has someone who wants to represent us for a speaking engagement and his question to me last week was, "When can you be Ophra ready?" What he was trying to say nicely was ,"When can you loose weight and get into shape?"

His reply: If you lose 2 pounds per month while e working out and continuing to monitor your diet, not obsessively, in one year you'll have lost 25 pounds and look smokin' hot. (If you lose 20 lbs per month you'll be 240 lbs lighter you might not want to do that.)

If you write for 1 hour per day (500 words) in one year you'll have a book of over 180000 words after you deduct 20% of them you'll have a gem.

"Success is the progressive realization of a worth ideal." Earl Nightingale


My new job a Canyon Ranch's mission is to inspire people to live healthy lives in order to realize their dreams. (paraphrased)

So, two pounds lighter and a few tears less, I've begun to take a bit of ownership of my existence. Realizing that being in choice is not always about choosing random things but also about choosing to be healthy.

When I told him I wanted to go to restorative yoga, but chose spinning and it nearly killed me, he replied,
Keep doing the cycling and remember what Nietzsche said,
 "That which does not quite kill me will make you (& me) strong."
Also George Bernard Shaw,
"If all we ever do in life are those things which are convenient and comfortable, the great things in life will not get done."


So, I'm off to get more healthy...in this moment...for today...lol...(work).

Wednesday, October 9

It's been two weeks since I've moved into my new apartment and started a new job. While the job is fun and exciting, the new apartment is stressful and lonely.

I remind myself often that I chose the journey of being a nomad and now I'm consciously choosing this journey of having my own place and acquiring new skills.

All my friends are kind and want to help me get settled in, but as I told them, "This isn't like "I'm getting married or having a baby! Party!" This is very stressful and it's taking some getting used to on my part. After all, even the statics say that moving is the 3rd biggest stress in ones life. (Why can't it be fun and exciting like it was for my cousin recently?)

For me, all diversions have been removed. I have no tv, not internet and to be honest, I'm so tired after work, after several exercise classes a day, I just go to bed.

A short meditation played on my iphone tonight as I drove home and it was about the Cancer sign, nurturing and caring. It came to me that I need to be Cancer for not only myself, but my latest project...my book. I resolved then and there to adopt a new attitude and to do whatever it takes to put me and my project first, just like any good mother would do for her young.

I know that I am fully supported by my family and friends. And I watch in awe daily as I witness first hand the support from Spirit. I continue on knowing that I am in choice in every moment. 

Tuesday, September 24

Often, having what you want is a function of letting go of what you have. The Universe

This was the saying from Tut.com this morning.

A couple of months ago one of my mentors asked this question of me, "How do you see the next twelve months of your life looking?" It was great he hadn't asked me one day longer because I would have just gone comatose. But for some reason, I knew instantly. I would be willing to take one year and learn the pieces that I seem to be missing to move ETL forward in this day and age of technology.

In order to do that, I would need a job to support myself and stay in one place for that period of time. I had already begun applying for jobs and I was hired at Canyon Ranch in Tucson in the Program Advising Department.

Knowing my housesitting gig was coming to an end soon, I began looking for an apartment and today I started my new job and signed a year lease on my apartment. While both were exciting, they also came with their panty-twists.

There were mounds of 'disclosures' and papers to sign in both places and putting my new address down felt so vulnerable.

 I wrote to my shaman that The Universe could see I was wigging out and threw me a bone. I got a brand new red couch, night stand and new queen bed, for $400. Where is the money coming from? I actually don't know. But what I do know is that if they arrived the money will follow.

She replied: Brand new bed, table and a red couch....sounds like more than a bone....enjoy the ride and laugh wholeheartedly at all the oh shit oh shit oh shit moments.....all is well and just perfect my friend....this will be a good year....no, a great one!

I had to trust and let go of the comfort of the familiar in order to experience new possibilities.



Sunday, August 25

Definition of Love from Wayne Dyer


A definition of Love:
The ability and willingness to let those that you care for to be what they choose for themselves, without any insistence that they satisfy you.

How can you reach the point of being able to let others be what they choose without meeting your expectations? Very simple. By loving yourself. By feeling that you are important, worthy and beautiful. Once your recognize just how good you are, you won’t have to have others reinforce your value or values by making their behavior conform to your dictates.

If you’re secure in yourself, you no longer need others to be like you. For one thing, you’re unique. For another, that would rob them of their own uniqueness. And what you love in them are just those traits that make them special and separate.

Self-Worth cannot be verified by others. You are worthy because you say it is so. If you depend on others for your value, then it is other-worth.

Where's Pati?

Since my last blog, I have in fact landed back in Green Valley, Az in another awesome home for the summer. I found myself in a state of depression, again, as tend to happens every time I shift.

My intention was to finish/start, whatever, my latest book, A Year in a Suitcase.

This summer I've been questioning what and where I'm headed and  and so I have put ETL on hiatus. What is it, and where is it going? Whose is my target audience and how do I promote it?

One of my mentors asked me the question, "How do you see yourself living the next 12 months of your life?" I was really glad that he said 12 months, anything longer would have put me comatose. Surprisingly, I instantly knew.

I'd would be willing to take one year and learn things that I seem to be missing to move ETL forward. To do that, I would need a job and stay in one place! Yes, I said, stay in one place!

So I made a list:
1. Work for Canyon Ranch - as a Program Advisor. Learn as much as I can about it all, including sales, phones, communication and how they move their business forward with social media, etc. Why Canyon Ranch? I feel like we're a perfect fit! I am missing some structure and people in my life and so this could fit the bill. Note to self. Just BE. It's the first "job" that I can say I'm totally excited about the possibility of having.
2. Work with Byron (an accomplished Dale Carnegie retiree)
3. Take the course at Dale Carnegie
4. Take Apple classes and learn Youtube and audio and Powerpoint for Tele seminars.

I was that clear, that quick. So, that's what I'm going to do.

If you want to know where I'll be for the next year. Tucson. Downtown or in the burbs? Or, if things get really magical as I know they can be, I'd be in a lovely home housesitting:)

PS. Today a man from WA state ordered my GPS for Living book. Thank you!! Someone is out there:)



Wednesday, June 26

ON THE ROAD AGAIN!

I woke up this morning, knowing it's my last day in gorgeous San Diego! What happens....a pit in my stomach, a catch in my breath and a knowing that I'll be making a Shift  again.

It seems silly as I know where I'm going and what I'll be doing, so what's the anxiety about? It's not about the not knowing (which has been part of my journey so far) so what is it?

Don't know...do I care? Should I care? 

What I am grateful for is that wherever I am...is the most beautiful place ever...wherever that is! I guess that is living in the moment. Certainly I've stayed in less than lovely places, but there is always something special about where I am...the places, the people, the animals and situations I encounter.  

So while I do have my panty twisting...still...probably always will...I catch them earlier, allow myself to feel them and then breath through them. Then I come out the other side...sooner!

I left for Phoenix this morning and am sitting at the car dealer, waiting for my car to be serviced, (16,000 miles - 6 months old!) I'll be heading to Green Valley, AZ where I'll spend a day before heading to Mt. Lemmon, AZ. Happy Summer! 

I appreciate and love you..thank you for your support...





Tuesday, June 25

IS IT TRUE BLONDES HAVE MORE FUN?


A lady Clariol Blonde, A Silky Shinny Blonde.....Any one remember the commercials from the 60's, where the blonde is the only one having fun? 

If you ask me what color my hair is, I'd say light brown, even though I know it's blonde. I guess, I don't feel blonde....whatever feeling blonde feels like! I was born a towhead, grew up in southern California, where I spent my spare time either at the beach or swimming in our pool. (When I was younger my hair acquired a nice green tone to it, making me less blonde!)

It is true that about once a year I head for Newport Beach to have my blonde brightened and I do like being blonde. However recently I've been considering changing the color.

I am house sitting for a neighbor that I haven't seen in many years. When I arrived, she said, "You probably don't recognize me because I changed my hair color. She HAD and it was beautiful. It is a deep auburn red. 

When she told me why she changed it I started questioning my own hair color. She is a school teacher and consultant for remote school districts. She said once she changed her hair color, she was taken more seriously at her job and valued for what she brought to the table. 

I started reflecting back on comments I've heard from men about how they prefer blondes (not all men, just the ones I'm referring to here.) I wondered how people feel about blondes and Marilyn Monroe came to mind...A Blonde Bombshell! And Dumb Blonde jokes...it's all about looks and nothing else.

I know my hair color doesn't define who I am. But I'm ready for some kind of change., just not sure it's hair color. But I do know that something has to change for me. Its time!

So....I'm thinking about it! OMG! It's not brain surgery...it's hair color for Petesake! 

Friday, June 21

FOLLOWING THE FLOW - HAPPY SUMMER SOLSTICE!

Summer Solstice! The longest day of the year! Yahoo!!! (Well, in the Northern Hemisphere anyway!)

This morning I took the two dogs that I'm sitting with for a hike up the mountain behind the house I'm staying. (read more) It has a trail that leads to the big white cross that is lit up will lights all night.

The trail is quite steep and rocky in places. It brought me back to my Yuba River hiking days, and how I wouldn't look too far ahead when the trail was steep. I'd place my focus directly in front of me and eventually I'd make it to my destination, whether it be the end of the trail or out of a canyon.

I was going to write that sometimes goals aren't the answer, sometimes, you just need to let things flow, which went along with a recent astrology blog I read by Simone Butler. (read more)

But I realized that I did have a goal. It was to reach the end or the top of the trail. However, my focus was on what was directly in front of me and not the end result.

Usually, I'm watching and feeling for the flow of energy. That's what I'm doing for this week. If you remember, I put down all the have to's, and went to In and Out Hamburgers. Feeling a bit better than yesterday, I'm now ready to enjoy the week doing whatever/wherever the energetic flow takes me.  (Today, Dana Point!) 




Thursday, June 20

DEPRESSION...MAJOR CONTRACTION!

I just left Green Valley, AZ, where I will be housesitting on some very special land and lovely house for the summer. Yahoo! Yesterday, I was headed to San Diego to housesit for a week. I took a detour to Joshua Tree National Forest, someplace that I pass up every time I head west and yet have never made the effort to stop, even though it's been calling my name for sometime. This time, I did! (Another blog.)

After a yummy dinner with my sister's family in So Cal, I continued on south to San Diego. When I began the climb up the steep driveway I started laughing. You've got to be kidding! Another spectacular home, in the hills of San Diego, complete with view of the city lights and swimming pool and spa! Wow! Whose the lucky girl?

With things seemingly going smoothly, why am I depressed? So depressed that I deactivated my Facebook. Why? I use it as a diversion when I sit down to write....Hmmmm, let me see what's happened since the last time I logged on...and...it just makes me feel bad about myself. 

I read the Writer's Blog....before writing your book you should: Write an overview paper. Whose your target audience paper? Write an about you paper. Establish yourself as an authority. Whose work is yours like? Now, I'm just paralyzed. While it's all great information, I don't know any of the answers.

On Facebook, I get invitations to join this club and that webinar. Again, I just feel bad about me....why? I'm not doing it! They're all doing what they love...they're all making money, they're taking risks and they have friends. Not me:(  (Yes, it's a small pity party, but we're in the shadow of a retrograde, so there!)

Well, the bottom line is...I don't know who my target audience is. (Not that I haven't been trying to figure it out!) I don't know how I want to continue my next book and I don't know anything! 

The problem: I don't care about following people, who their friends are and what they ate yesterday. And I don't think anyone cares about that for me. I promote thinking for oneself, not following. 

Someday when I learn how to use social media, I will! Until then....I'm taking a week off! I'm not working and I'm not writing any in my book! (Even though my BFF and I have a date to compare books when I return to AZ. I'll just have to go empty handed!) 

What I know about contractions, is that there is a birth following! So for now...I'm going to enjoy this beautiful place and when the energy begins to flow again...I'll follow it...until then....Enjoy your summer! It's the official first day today:)))) Yahoo! 


Tuesday, June 18

Social Responsibility vs Loyalty

Living my unconventional lifestyle (for now), I've taken on some pretty random jobs. A couple of years ago, I found myself working at Fry's, a chain supermarket in AZ. I was hired on part time at $7.50 an hour. Twenty years previous, I worked for Von's (supermarket in CA) as a journeyman clerk and I was making $17.00 an hour.

I was working this job in order to help publish a book that I was writing at the time and living rent free because of my friend's generosity. It was very clear to me that a person living in the real world would not be able to live on this salary. I knew for myself that it was going to be short term, but what about the other people who had to live on these wages? How can they afford to live like this? What about health insurance? (I go to Mexico to get my teeth cleaned.)

My daughter was on an organic health kick at the time and was insisting that I buy organic. While I do agree with the philosophy, I couldn't justify the extra expense. I could buy a half gallon of juice at Wal-Mart for half the price as the local supermarket.

I was at a conference when I met Barb who was promoting social justice in all areas of life. I purchased a little book from her to help me understand what and who corporate villains were and why it was important not to support them.

I noticed that all of the companies that had taken a chance and given me a credit card after my bankruptcy were all corporate villains. (Companies that put profit over everything else.)

The dilemma for me...to stay loyal to these companies, after all they took a chance with me, or to close the accounts...sending a message of dissatisfaction with their business ethics.

Whatever one's beliefs are about the subject, becoming educated will help each of us to make better decisions on the companies and products that we support. 

Saturday, June 15

LIFE LESSONS ARE ALWAYS OURS

When we find the courage to practice clear-direct-communication, it's important to share what we're feeling, (not always that easy) remembering that the lessons in life are always OURS! 

A friend recently told me of her and her husband's willingness to work on their communication. Every time that he barbecued  hamburgers, she got hers opposite of what she had asked for. 

One night, he asked her if she wanted him to barbecue hamburgers. She calmly replied, "No, thank you!" He was puzzled. She explained that every time she got her hamburger, it was how she didn't like it. 

After many times, what she felt like saying was, "You stupid moron! Cook it like I asked!" But she was able to hold her tongue, take a deep breath and tell him how she was feeling.

"When you cook my hamburger exactly opposite of how I ask for it, it makes me feel, unimportant:  you don't care enough give me what I ask for and unheard: you are not listening to me."

When we are able to share how we're feeling, it takes the focus off of the other person and places it back on ourselves, exactly where it belongs!

Remember that the lessons are always ours! When we make it about the other person, we miss the teaching for ourself! 




Sunday, June 2

LETTING GO WITH CLEAR INTENTION

"Why you need to live in good weather don't you?" The words of an Irish Mystic that I saw during my four months in Ireland ran through my head this morning as I woke up in the Pacific Northwest to another day of clouds and drizzles.

Yes! Yes! I do need the sun! Finally, someone knows that besides me! Days without sun leave me nearly comatose. It seems the sun is up about 5:30AM and I'm not...and then when I'm up...the sun is not! I've been here in Vancouver, WA for the past two weeks and this has been the pattern.

However, I've come to appreciate the benefits of the light drizzle and last Monday was one. It was Memorial Day and we decided to drive to Bagby Hot Springs, in the Cascade Mountains at Mt. Hood.

Before we left, I picked up a book to take with me, The Way of the Shaman. A gentle reminder for me not to miss any part of the journey. Yes, we were going to enjoy the healing mineral water, but there was so much more to experience, if I'd just pay attention.

I'm pretty sure the drizzle is what kept the crowds away that day. When we arrived, there were quite a few cars, however we were rewarded with the secluded hot tub on the top being vacant. What's extra nice about these hot springs is the tubs are drainable after each use. (I know, that seems contrary to the places where water is an issue, but not here! The water flows freely, continuously! There is nothing to shut off!)

When we had finished our soak, I suggested that we do a releasing ceremony, leaving all of the burdens that we were carrying with us behind. The lightest drizzle continued as we all made a whirlpool with our hands. Then we all thought of the things that we wanted to let go of...anxiety, fear, pain, distrust, etc., and then placed our awareness on the swirling warm, healing water. With clear intention, we placed the things that we were willing to let go of, in the middle. We then let out the plug and along with the vortex of water, they all went swirling down the drain.

Just then the rain picked up noticeably and I knew that we had been supported by Spirit. I've witnessed this for myself many times and it was magical to be a part of this releasing ceremony in the spirit filled Cascade Mountains.

Try it for yourself! If you need help or encouragement, email me and I'll tell you how:)

Saturday, May 25

MANIFESTATION

I had set an intention: To live in a lovely place for the summer, without cost to me, so that I could finish my third book and work on new business strategies. It worked! I got exactly that!

The problem: Once that all came into place, I started getting other house sitting job opportunities for pay, that started me thinking and spinning. Money! I have to have a way to support myself. So, I began to wonder: Is it the little one inside stirring up shit when things are calm, or is it The Universe/God, sending me ways to support myself?

The solution: Talking (it's how I process), getting more information from the jobs, waiting, praying, listening, watching for the signs and FEELING INTO WHAT MY BODY WAS TELLING ME. Getting out of my head and into my body is the answer and yet it's the hardest one for me to do. 

After two weeks of the above, I talked with the original summer gig. I told her all of my concerns. She not only met them, she even had a solution as to how I was going to support myself for three months. She has a neighbor whose mothers goes to Mt. Lemon (AZ) each summer. She's 89 and needs a companion. What was offered to me, was to go there every other week, Fri-Mon. After all was said and done, I set a price and she agreed. Going to Mt. Lemon in the heat of the desert should be delightful. This is exactly what I did in Ireland for four months. Thank you to all who lent me an ear to process! 

Manifestation is easy. It's setting the goal that's more difficult for me. Once you have your goal, say it's a new house for example. You know what it looks like, the area it's in and the price you're willing to pay. Write it down, SAY IT OUT LOUD. Give thanks that your perfect home is on it's way. Trust in Divine Timing  and in Divine Wisdom. Don't settle! There's no hurry, you have all the time you need. Don't let anyone bring you down with their pessimism. It is out there! (Be sure to put a picture of your dream home on your frig, giving thanks (as if it's already happened) each time you see it. This works for everything. Trust and be patient. I'm living proof! Happy Manifestation! 


Tuesday, May 21

TRUST YOURSELF

I committed to housesitting for a lovely home in Green Valley, AZ for the summer. My intention: To have a lovely place to stay (rent free) while I finish my third book and get some business ideas together. (While I'm on the road, I find that it's too difficult to stay focused on my projects. Why? Because I haven't set goals????)

Lately, I've been getting other housesitting offers (for pay) that would keep me on the road. Very tempting!!

The trap: Money and the allure of adventure! Now, Is it a trap or has my intention changed? Hmmmm....Is the Universe supporting my intention with these jobs or are they a distraction? Certainly I need money to live. Could I change my intention and set some goals that would keep me focused?

Question: Where am I giving myself away for money? Where am I not trusting that I will be supported? Where am I not trusting my decision to stay put? Is staying put...in alignment with my journey? What do I choose today? How do I want to create my life? It's the codependency vacillation rearing it's ugly head....I don't know! Yes, you do know....

The answers are within me. I just have to get out of my head and into my body...my body knows...how is it feeling? 

Sunday, May 19

CLEAR INTENTION

Practicing for the Color me Rad, 5K that's coming up in two weeks, I realized that I was babying my right knee. This movement was causing a chain reaction of discomfort, down to the ankle and up to my thigh. 

I noticed that when I began looking in front of me; taking my focus off my knee and putingt it to where I was heading that my limp improved. It became clear that once I was walking with clear intention, and focused on where I was going,  I stopped hobbling along. 

I thought back to when I was with my aunt recently who has Parkinson's. She would shuffle her feet in little baby steps until I told her to focus on the end of the hall. Her steps became bigger and she became more confident in her walking. She had changed where she placed her awareness.

Energy follows intention. 
It matters where and on what, we place our awareness. 
What we focus on is what we'll create.

Doreen Virtue's Weekly Oracle Card Reading this past week said that it is time to take a risk; example, with a relationship or job; go away from or work towards. Or take a risk with something that you're wanting to create. St. Michael (The Protector) has our back! But we won't know what to change or create without a clear intention or goal! 

Tuesday, May 14

Out of your comfort zone....where magic happens!


After spending the past few days in Green Valley, AZ, I was surprised to hear that generally people thought that while I'm away, I'm out partying every night!

My daughter, a basketball referee, who spends many hours on the road during the season, runs into the same general comments. Basketball referee....you must party after all the games!

Uh...the truth: When traveling is part of your job and you get time off all you want to do is rest, veg out or sleep! While I'm "On assignment", I work really for up to 18hrs a day! I stay in unfamiliar places, I'm living around unfamiliar people and I'm always out of my comfort zone. 

While living out of my comfort zone, I find there are many challenges. It forces me to live in the moment and to be conscious. There is no 'zoning out.' I have to pay attention to where I'm going and where I've been. 

The truth for me is that when I'm out of my comfort zone, that's when the magic happens. When I'm not expecting anything and I have no preconceived concepts, I am free to watch and experience the little magical moments when Spirit Support manifests into reality. When this happens for me, there are no words....it just stops me in my tracks and I'm grateful to be a witness to it. 

Anything that takes us away from what is familiar to us has the potential for making magical things happen. When we're not doing what is familiar, we're open to seeing and experiencing things without any preconceived ideas or expectations!

Try it....take a different route home, go to a different restaurant...stop in to a store that you've never been or thought you'd find yourself...maybe a tattoo parlor? It's literally where magic can happen!!! 

Saturday, May 11

WHERE AM I...AND WHAT AM I DOING?

"Where am I and what am I doing?" I could vaguely hear the words coming from the other room. It was early morning and my cousin had just returned from ten glorious warm (mostly) days in Florida with her husband. She lives a 'sandwich lifestyle.' A husband, job, adult children and aging parents consume most of her days.

Today as I woke up, I found myself wondering the same thing! "Where am I? And what am I doing?" 

After two weeks in IL, working with a client in transition, I spent this past week in familiar territory with friends in AZ who will play with me. They take me dancing and out to sing karaoke. Three of us old ladies, tried to sing Baby Got Back....it was a mess, but we had fun! 

Today, I'm heading to San Francisco to spend Mother's Day with one of my daughter's. Then to Grass Valley, CA and Vancouver, WA. 

Living life from a suitcase can keep things interesting but it also has its challenges. Where am I and what am I doing?....are two! 

  







Thursday, May 9

GOAL SETTING

You can't reach something that you don't know what it is. Once you know what you want, you can get it! I've never been very good at this on a personal level. As a recovering codependent, I have trouble knowing what I want. I've spent years knowing what others want. 

I just drove back from Illinois, two weeks on the road. I was helping a client who had a house and several storage sheds across the country. She has a job that allows her the freedom of moving and so with each move she put her things into storage and hit the road. 

The time had come to collect her belongings in one place. (This action is as much about calling all the little pieces of our souls back to us as it is about the stuff.)

When I arrived on Wednesday, she announced that she was going to have gallbladder surgery on Friday and that we probably wouldn't be able to continue the project. 

We sat some goals: To remove, pack and throw away stuff from her two story town home, garage, basement and storage shed, have the truck loaded and be on the road to Oklahoma by next Thursday. They said it couldn't be done. But I knew that if we had something to shoot for, we could make it happen. And we did! 

We stopped in Oklahoma to pick up some things from her father's house and a storage unit there. When we arrived to AZ, we collected the things from another storage shed and I am happy to say that she is now sorted! 

While it was an intense few weeks, she looks wonderful, a new lightness of Spirit! By her willingness to move forward not only set her free it also gives her son the freedom to do the same with his journey. He's also free from the energetic bondage of watching her stuff

While I do this goal setting with ease for others....why can't I do it for myself? I am confident that if I knew what I wanted, I could get it....LOL! 

Sunday, April 28

STUFF is an Energy Vampire!



Remember the song...WAR by Edwin Starr in 1969? He asks the question. War, what is it good for? Absolutely nothing....say it again ya all!!!"

As a transition specialist, I've been traveling from Northern CA to Peoria, Il helping people with transition which always involves letting go of stuff! 

STUFF is an energy vampire! It always stays in our minds. We romanticize as if it were a young lover's fling. 

We remember our stuff fondly, but in reality, like with all things, time has taken it's tole. Our stuff has been moved from point A to point B a billion times. It's been boxed and re-boxed, hauled and stacked, peed on by pets and has made nice homes for mice and rats. And still....we can't let it go...why? 

I pose the question. STUFF what is it good for? Absolutely nothing! 

Well, not exactly true. Stuff serves many purposes. Stuff is here for our pleasure and enjoyment. It's all well and good as long as it serves us and we're not in service to our stuff. 

On an emotional level, stuff gives us an opportunity to deal with the shit we create in our lives. (Among other things.) It's just a outward mirror for what's happening on the inside. In fact, dealing with our stuff....can be overwhelming and can literally make us ill. That's where I come in as support. 

The most freeing thing I've ever done (and hard) was to let go of everything that didn't fit into a 22" suitcase and backpack. Like an onion, I had to do it in layers, each time I was able to let go of a bit more. Whatever I have, wallet, purse or suitcase, I have to fill every last inch!  And now that I own a car, I can always add one more thing!! It's absolutely exhausting!

So, what keeps us holding onto our stuff? (Nice chapter for the book I'm working on!)* Of course the answer is emotional...what else? 

Can you let it go? If not...why not?  Why does our stuff make us crazy and still we can't let it go? 

Our stuff is comforting...as long as we have our stuff...we don't have to change...I have no point...just wondering...your thoughts? 

*Watch for the chapter (Our Stuff) in my new book, A Year in a Suitcase coming later this year.)




Tuesday, April 16

FOLLOWING THE FLOW OF ENERGY

Hitting the road again....heading to Oakland, CA and then Grass Valley, CA.

Everywhere that I travel, people are always very supporting of me and the journey that I have chosen to be on for this part of my life....with all of its up's and down's. Thank you!

It's a long drive from AZ to Oakland...about 15 hours. However after getting a late start (a picnic in Madera Canyon, not to have been missed:) I decided to test the waters of travel. If there was a possibility for me to spend the night in Huntington Beach, I'd head directly west to San Diego. Otherwise, I'd head north to Bakersfield. 

Yes, to HB and so I drove across I-8 to San Diego. Following the guidance of my GPS, (which I don't always do) I found myself headed to Ramona and Santee (suburbs) which would then connect with I-805. It was unfamiliar territory for me, it was dark, and so it was unusual for me to follow the advice of my GPS. 

Ramona was a place we used to visit a lot as we were kids. I had an uncle who lived there. We thought it was on another planet...it was so remote. My ex-husbands sister used to live in Santee. As I was driving up over the hill to get I-805, I began feeling what I refer to as panty-twisting. An extreme energy surge filled my body. What's this about?  I began to ground myself, stay in my body and started deep, slow, conscious breathing. I remained asked the question to my guidance, "Is there anything that I need to know? 

I knew that I had been led by Spirit, in this area for whatever reason. I knew it to be an energetic healing of some sort. I also know that on this journey that I have chosen, I am on a need to know basis! I knew that I didn't need to spend time trying to figure it out. All that was required of me was the willingness to follow the flow of energy, consciously bringing love and light with me wherever I go. 

I'm thankful that I do have the courage to continue into the unknown and discover what God/The Universe has out there for me to uncover!  When you pay attention in your life...where is Spirit leading you? Where are you taking your love and light? I'm in great company!!!!

PS. Now I'm in Grass Valley, CA.

Thursday, April 11

SAY YES TO LIVING!

Say YES to LIVING! 
WHICH MEANS... 
STOP SAYING NO...
STOP PROCRASTINATING... 
STOP MAKING EXCUSES... 
STOP PROTECTING YOUR HEART...
STOP ALREADY!


I'm finding that in traveling many people are totally complacent with their life. They like how it is and when asked to go for a hike or a movie or anything out of their regular routine, they say No. 

I loved the movie YES, with Jim Carey. He had recently come out of a bad relationship breakup and was stuck, saying NO to everyone and everything. Nearly loosing his friends, he was challenged to attend a YES seminar. He had to say YES to everything he was asked. Eventually he learned to decide for himself was his answer going to be YES or was it going to be NO. 

As with many of us. He had gotten into the habit of saying NO to things out of his daily routine. I myself have experienced the amazing benefits by learning to say YES to life, even when I didn't understand how things could possibly work out! 

" Always say "yes" to the present moment. What could be more futile, more insane, than to create inner resistance to what already is? What could be more insane than to oppose life itself, which is now and always now? Surrender to what is. Say "yes" to life - and see how life suddenly starts working for you rather than against you." - Eckhart Tolle

Life is for living, not playing it safe, remaining in dead end situations because it's the path of least resistance.  Life is for experiencing, learning and enjoyment. When we can take time from our everyday routines and make time for laughter and joy in everyday situations, we can then live as Auntie Mamme advised:

Live, Live, Live....Life is a banquet and most poor souls are starving! 

PS. For those interested, I'm heading out On The Road Again...Oakland, CA, Grass Valley, CA, Peoria, Il, Oklahoma, Green Valley, AZ, Portland, OR & Vancouver, WA. Hope to see you out there!

Embrace Change: Adventure is out there!!!! 

Sunday, April 7

WOBBLING IS PART OF FINDING BALANCE IN LIFE

I was at an Introductory to Yoga class last week. One of the things that we practiced was tree pose, where you balance yourself on one leg. Certainly many of us were wobbly in the beginning, some even using the wall for support. 

The instructor then asked us to purposely get ourselves off balance. As we all wobbled with arms and legs waving in the wind, she then asked us to place our awareness on our core muscles, squeezing tightly and following the breath back to stability, even on one leg. 

This instantly brought to my mind finding balance in life. That is life; finding balance, body, mind and spirit.  Even when we seem to have found our balance, something happens and things get askew again. Wobbling is a part of living. It is simply an opportunity to turn our attention to the moment, and evaluate how we want to begin again.

Using a toddler learning to walk as a mirror for ourselves, we can see clearly that with loving patience with ourselves, falling down, getting up....wobbling, placing our attention back in the moment and breathing we can conquer any challenges that come our way. Happy Wobbling! 

Friday, April 5

FUNKY, FUNKY....

I'm here in Green Valley, AZ. While, like everywhere that I've traveled, I meet the most amazing people and have the most enchanting time. But today for some reason, I've been in a major funk! MAJOR! Watch out, anyone in my tracks today!~ PS...I'm sorry....

I've applied for several jobs....all jobs that I am well qualified for. I even had my business coach review my resumes and cover letters and have had zero response. Yes, I know why I am not getting "JOBS", I'm not supposed to have one. My business coach said that he was mad for me. He's surprised that no one has even responded to my inquiries let alone not have been offered any positions. I said, "I know why! If someone offered me a job, I'd take it and that would take me off of my shamanic journey of following the flow of energy." Adding insult to injury, friends are around me are getting great jobs! 

I drove to Tucson today with a list filled with things to accomplish, starting with yoga. I then went to see a friend who owns a hot pool for aquatic massages to inquire about her position at Canyon Ranch. (A high end spa.) We brainstormed about some summer possibilities at her facility.

Next, I drove around in circles, not knowing what to do or where to go! I called a friend who was going to meet me in town and she said, "You sound tired or down. You should come back to my house." I started to head south but realized that wasn't the answer.

It was my child who was panty twisting and the wise parent finally came to the rescue. "Pati, when you're feeling off balance, go inside and follow the breath, until you feel a sense of calmness. Then go back to the last thing that was familiar and stand there until you gain clarity." The last thing...I have a list of things to accomplish. Even though it was the last thing that I wanted to do, I simply put one foot in front of the other, took out the list and carried on. 

I stopped by to see my shamanic astrologer friend who explained why I was in this funk. (Yes, something to do with the alignment of the planets!) Her husband and I have the same astrological charts and he said that he's been in a I don't want to, state of mind. He doesn't want to move in the world and do the things that he's been doing to generate a cash flow. ( Always a nice mirror for me!)

It's nearly 1AM as I write this. While I can't sleep and I still feel like curling up in bed and crying.  And I can't exactly put my finger on what the issues are, it's nice to know two things. One, someone had added a comment on the blog....so thank you for being out there....all of you....and secondly, THIS TOO SHALL PASS:-) One thing that always is true for me. I feel better after I've written:-) So thanks for listening:-)






Thursday, March 28

PEOPLE DO MAKE A DIFFERENCE! STAND UP!


On Monday night, the violence in Oakland hit incredibly close to home... at 9:00 pm a man was shot outside of my house as he fought back in an attempted car jacking. Hearing the shots closely followed by the sound of a grown man screaming for help is still haunting me...
Although I'm new to this part of The Town, I claim all of Oakland and I remain proud of my decision to raise my child as a son of this inspiring city. Though shaken, I will not waiver in my unending celebration of the spirit I've only experienced here.
Tonight, my neighbor is organizing an event in Adam's Point to help empower folks to feel connected to making things right. It's simple, show up, shine a light, meet a neighbor. For incentive, feel free to come by my place around 8 for wine and snacks and stay to hang out and make your presence known.

THE COMMUNITY RESPONSE: Over eighty people overcame their fear of going outside (including my friend) and joined forces, lights in hand, meeting each other a

Wednesday, March 20

Conventional Living...Depends on One's Perspective

Sometimes one can learn much more about life, love, and happiness, when they're single than when they're in a relationship, when they're looking for work than when they're working, when they're confused than when they're clear, and so on..  

And if they allow themselves to learn what there is to learn, rather than resist, their life will be transformed, and that which was, will be no longer.          
So happy for you,   The Universe


My sister sent this to me when I was having my latest panty-twist about not living a conventional life, which generally happens each time I leave where I currently am and having to trust that someone out there knows where I'm going next! 

Here I am, on my next assignment in Kansas City. How did I know I was going to come? 1. I was invited  2. The plane fare was $99 round-trip (yes, I had some points), but nevertheless.

I'm having a great time...staying in bed with Benny (a shitzu), working on my third book,  (A Year in a Suitcase) and taking my aunt on field trips, who is in assisted living. 

Living a conventional life well, I suppose that depends on one's perspective!:)

Sunday, March 17

STUPID BOYS...LOL...TRUSTING YOUR INTUITION

Stupid Boy...the song performed on The Voice by winner Cassadee Pope, played over and over in my mind as I frantically threw my things into my car as the owner of the house I was sitting for came home right on schedule. LOL! But...trusting what others were telling me, instead of myself, I wasn't prepared! I hadn't listened to what I knew  to be true and what my intuition was telling me. 

I knew the owner was coming home on Tuesday, making Monday evening my last night in my last housesitting gig.     I knew this! 

However, after having dinner with the 82 year old male owner who was staying at a local retirement community while his wife took a vacation with her daughter told me that his wife was spending the night in SFO on Tuesday and picking him up on Wednesday morning. When a neighbor concurred I  called the son-in-law who also agreed. 

I went away for the afternoon and got a sick feeling in my stomach. I knew that I needed to return to the house. Yep, you guessed it....the wife was home with my stuff still there! YIKES! 

I like to have everything cleaned and ready when the owners return. I felt embarrassed as I ran around like a maniac trying to get everything cleaned without looking like a mad-woman! 

Of course, it had nothing to do with stupid boys...it simply was a reminder for me to trust what I know! 

Sunday, March 3

Let Go of Expectations and Celebrate! Your Way!



One of my favorite books used to be The Discipline of Celebration! I was a young mother  at the time and who had time to celebrate? 

But as I've gotten older and have become a Self-Care & Transition Specialist, I have come to appreciate the power of  Celebration! 

A friend of mine was getting ready to retire from a major airlines. Her expectations of how her last interview would look and the reality of what really happened were miles apart. 

Leaving her retirement interview, she felt sort of dismissed and unappreciated for all the years of service she had provided for the company. 

My friend is the ultimate in understanding and putting into practice what celebration and self-care look like. So she went across the street from her hotel, got two chocolate shakes, a hamburger, onion rings and walked back to the hotel to split them with her husband. On the side walk she found a perfectly shaped round stone, which she quickly picked up and claimed as her gift from The Universe for the completion of many years of dedicated service and adventure that working for the airlines had afforded her. 

In life, if we can let go of your expectations of how we think something should be or look and accept them for how they are, we will save ourselves many little disappointments!

We've got to make the moments special ourselves!  Seize the moment and CELEBRATE YOU...in everything you do!  Celebrate the many micro-movements forward in life....heck just celebrate that fact that we're pointed in the right direction...or not! LOL







Thursday, February 28

REALLY??? LOL

As I started my next housesitting job, I fed the cat in the afternoon, as had been instructed by its owner. When I returned the next morning, I didn't think too much about the fact that the cat food had not been touched. I figured, it would 'show up' eventually. 

As I went about the chores, I began to hear something coming from the master bedroom which had a deadbolt lock on it. Yep! You guessed it....the cat had been locked in there! 

I called a locksmith to free the cat and the owner's son in law came to install a new lock. When I returned later in the day and the cat food had still not been eaten, I did a little more investigation. Listening once again at the MB door, I heard a loud noise and MEOWWWWW, again, coming from the MB. 

The cat had been locked a second time in the MB! REALLY??? 

By the way, the loud noise was the cat playing with the door stopper! 










Monday, February 25

The Academy Awards

How do you feel about the Academy Awards?

I visited with an older conservative friend yesterday, suggesting that he watch the Academy Awards that evening as he had nothing else planned.

His response: "I'm not going to watch those sinful people!" I burst out laughing! "What?" I asked, not believing what I was hearing.

"Those sinful people!" he reiterated! "They've been married many times and have affairs!" "Really," I asked. "They have ALL been married multiple times and they are ALL having affairs?"

While people in the eye of the media are always up for criticism what I've discovered while on my journey of self-discovery is that their lives are not that much different than many lives of average people. 

There is not one person on this earth who is not on their own personal path of soul evolution. How we experience life, learn and evolve is as unique as we are as individuals.

Artist's and their work can be encouraging, inspiring and thought provoking. Many are generous and bring light to many worthwhile causes. Their work can make us laugh, cry, see things from a new perspective, lift our spirits and broaden our minds! Now that's pretty impressive! 

Saturday, February 23

Mercury Retrograde (Communication Planet)

"For the next few weeks you could feel like you're driving backward in a swamp without a rear view mirror after a few shots of tequila." Simone Butler states in her most recent blog.   http://astroalchemy.com/driving-backward-in-a-swamp-2-22-13/ 


Mercury Retrograde officially began at 1:41 this morning, however you may have been feeling its effects for the past week. 

I have a friend on a vision quest (perfect timing...spiritual support) and he's coming up with the craziest experiences, so crazy, you'd think they're made up, but not so! (Mercury Retrograde - magnifying our vulnerabilities and fantasies, but also bringing deep insights through our intuition and dreams! ) 

He's learning to stay awake and conscious on his journey. He's a 75 year old male. In the beginning of his trip he was getting picked up by hookers (LOL) and his journey last night took him to a bikers bar! When asked if he voted for Obama by a biker chick and he said yes, he was advised to leave quickly...which he did, (without any emotions attached)....something he possibly wouldn't have done a week ago! Nice job G! 

The muck that's being stirred up in our lives is a gift for us to see what's lurking in the bottom of the pond in our life. Where are we holding in our bodies past hurts that are now being exposed, allowing healing on a deeper level. 

Let it happen. Stay present and breathe....deep slow breathing, all that matters is the breath! 

Don't let fears and frustrations rule this next phase of your life. Practice Clear-Direct, Communication in every moment and let your imagination imagination use the stirred up muck as fertilizer for new creative projects!! Happy Creating!